Angola v Portugal, ITV1

You don't expect to have a socio-political angle thrown at you at every early opportunity when you tune in for an ITV World Cup match, but that colonial aspect was the angle that Gabby and Peter Drury were willing to go on at length about to the detriment of, well, talking about the match. Indeed, Drury is still in the process of completing his analysis of local relations when Portugal nearly score. With that in mind, when Portugal did eventually score perhaps his declaration "the lords and masters are in charge from the start" could have been more tactful. Is this World Cup Live or Roots? At half time, the first half having eventually fizzled out into actual describing the action, Andy highlights Scolari missing a high five with his assistant, and as if it were 1977 the film gets shuttled back and forth a couple of times for extra comedy. They're working this 3D pitch, aren't they? Eventually they might find something they want to point out in greater detail on it and use it after the game rather than just at half time. Back at the game Pleat gets obsessed by whether Peter Crouch could have reached a high cross, and then whether Crouch on stilts might have, as Drury works in a Stoke Delilah reference. The second half is much of a muchness, only really springing into commentary life when Pleat declares Maniche "had such a quality time" in Euro 2004. Indeed, everyone is so laid back after a game that failed to produce a hammering that Andy actually makes a decent point comparing Pauleta's one up front play to Crouch's. Obviously, Gabby immediately leads him on to making a joke about an Angolan sub's hair.

What we've learned: Portugal still should be better than they are; Luis Figo still has it; Angola lack the self-belief, especially when they took their lead striker off